Demi Demi versus Slim Slacks

Battle Of The Pants

(foto/foto)

Of ook wel:

Clarkson Island

De Engelse komieken Harry Enfield en Paul Whitehouse (oa The Fast Show & Help) zetten Top Gear-presentator Jeremy Clarkson vakkundig  te kakken in Clarkson Island. Niet geheel onterecht als je z’n standpunten inzake milieu, vossenjacht, jeugdcriminaliteit, Europa en de overheid in het algemeen bekijkt. Jean-Marie Dedecker zoekt nog mensen voor een Engelse afdeling, Jeremy! Niet twijfelen!

Ook z’n pompeuze manier van praten ontsnapt niet:

We’re not actually Clarksons as such. But we talk a bit like him. Well probably the thing that’s most like the genuine Clarkson is we

pause            in the middle        of our sentences.

Wat dan weer doet denken aan de verschijningen van Steve Stevaer’ in Alles Kan Beter.

Harry & Paul: elke maandag om 23u op BBC 2. Zeker kijken, kan u zeggen dat u het net als bij The Fast Show, Top Gear, Coupling etc.. al beu was tegen dat het hier op tv kwam.

Ow Usain buck up wif his madda

Usain Bolt finally returned to Jamaica this past week. ‘Lightning’ Bolt dazzled at the Beijing Olympics, with three gold medals and as many world records to show for it. (video)

Rakibuzzaman has the inside scoop on what went down when the sprint wunderkint met up with his family. Turns out even the Bolt family isn’t safe from the ‘Slang Bangers Syndrome’.

The Bolts (source)

Usain: Ere me now, Usain back inna dee yard, back inna Kingston. IM NUMBA WAN IM NUMBA WAN!!!

Madda: (sighs) At last, here’s my youth.

Usain: Hail madda! Beijing was boonoonoonous! Eye won triple golds! Me a run a whole heap fastah thanna dee resta dee world! Me a mash up di place! Ya no see it?

Madda: Yes boy, I saw that. Now sit down, you’ve got some explaining to do.

Usain: Nah, me cyaan sidung. Eye am no. 1! Me am fast like a bullit! Coo’pon me shiny medals!

Madda: Sit your butt down! Why did you slow down at the 100 metres? That was downright disrespectful!

Usain: But madda, ya near as bad as Jacques Rogge. Ya need to ease up with dem boderationz! When me a feel da riddim of da Gully Creepa me a need to skin mi teeth & dance, sight?

Madda: And worse, people tell me you’ve been eating Chicken Nuggets. I don’t care how they do it over there, but here it’s strictly yams & ackee, you hear?

Usain: But madda, eye had a wanga-gut aftah me bunks mi res. Runna need to nyam, sight? Yuh nebber see empty bag tan up! But madda, wa mek a ya so vex?! Sinting is wrong?

Madda: Yes, there is, Mr. Hard Ears. My tiny Usain, what has happened to you? Thinking you’re some rudeboy now, forgetting all about your roots and family.

Usain: No madda, me a swear, me nevah no do nutin like dat. Juh-may-kan 4 evah! To tella yuh dee truth, mi a miss yuh chaklit cake with nuff icenin. Mi a realize: yuh can tek Usain outta Juhmaykah but yuh cyan tek Juhmaykah outta Usain.

Madda: Don’t you remember the words of the prophet Mr. T?

Madda: It’s about time you man up & take care of the family yams like you promised.

Usain: Jesum Peeze, yuh fi rite. Me gwaan cease & sekkle. Mi gwaan a maas mi money & start a grow dee yams inna di morrows. Me a keep it irie from now on, sweah!